What A True Malaysian Should Know

1. NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS : Ajinomoto

2. NATIONAL INSTANT FOOD : Maggi Mee

3. NATIONAL BREAKFAST : Nasi Lemak

4. NATIONAL LUNCH : Nasi Ayam

5. NATIONAL SUPPER : Roti Canai and Teh Tarik

6. NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE : Traffic Jam

7. NATIONAL CONDOM : None. Most Malaysians still feel embarrassed buying condoms. So they rushed into a 7-11, hurriedly grab the nearest pack, any pack, pay and leave before the cashier can even blink an eye.

8. NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN) : Food Poisoning

9. NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN) : Menstrual Pain

10. NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY WOMEN WHEN REFUSING SEX : Headache, kids not asleep, maid not asleep,mother-in-law around, early appointment, food not digested yet, aircond not cold enough, aircond too cold, nail polish not dry yet, forgot to take the pill, sleepy, stomach cramps, period, haven't remove make-up, haven't shower, no water supply, going to watch 'Santa Barbara', depress, no mood, etc...

11. NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY MEN WHEN REFUSING SEX : None. Malaysian men never refuse sex.

12. NATIONAL CURE FOR DIARRHOEA : Cap Kaki Tiga. Down one bottle with warm water and you are all 'dried up'.

13. NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES : Panadol. The 'cure for all'. If it fails we have another secret weapon - Tiger Balm.

14. NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS: Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

15. NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES) : Happy Hours.

16. NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES) : The sight of a police road block.

17. NATIONAL RICE COOKER : NATIONAL Rice Cooker

18. NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP : Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.

19. NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME : Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!

20. NATIONAL ANSWER FOR 'WHERE ARE YOU' ? : on the way.

21. NATIONAL OFFICIAL TIME FOR BEING LATE : 10 minutes

22. NATIONAL REASON FOR PRICE INCREASE : Petrol naik lagi kawan... semua barang pun kena naik ler... inclusive chicken meat?

23. NATIONAL REASON FOR PETROL INCREASE : Still cheaper than other country la....

24. NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR CAUSING TRAFFIC JAM : there was accident on the other side of the road.. of course must slow down and tengok-tengok, kaypoh-kaypoh lah!

25. NATIONAL REASON WHEN REJECTING INVITATION : 'I got some work to do la..u all go first la..'

26. NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR JUMPING QUEUE (TRAFFIC JAM OR WHAT EVER QUEUE) : Everybody doing what lah.......

27. NATIONAL EXCUSE NOT PAYING SAMAN ACCORDING TO DUE DATE : Relax ler... government will give discount one of these days

28. NATIONAL EXCUSE TO BRIBE (ANY CONDITION) : Give them minum kopi lar...